Ever since returning from my vacation, I have suffered a staggering number of sneezes while sitting at my desk. Just earlier this morning after a giant kershnoozle, the person talking on the phone to my coworker asked if there was a dog barking in the library. I don't feel poorly. This behavior has not been marked anywhere outside of the library. The nasal eruptions are non-productive yet horrifically noisy. My obvious conclusion? I am allergic to work!
I'm sure it has nothing to do with the big, dusty piles of Stuff To Do by which I am surrounded. Never!
I'm pretty sure you qualify for disability if you're allergic to work. And then you never have to go back!